“In the future, there will be no female leaders. There will just be leaders.” 
― Sheryl Sandberg

Asking For a Friend | Chapter 18

Asking For a Friend | Chapter 18

Advice from Babe to Babe

In this week’s edition of Asking For a Friend, the BWH Advice Gurus talk us through the challenges of feeling stuck in our current jobs, as well as how to navigate searching for a new one! Through thick and thin, our Babes are here with real-world advice from every industry.

AFAF _ 17 (2).jpg

I think it’s fine to be transparent about wanting to move to the area, but I would just leave it at, “I’m really excited to start a new adventure here in (city) and think this job would be a perfect fit!” The personal details are none of your potential employer’s business.


It’s totally personal preference and based on how much of a “sharer” you are. I think if you’re OK being frank about it, it gives your potential new employer a more honest look at why you’re looking to leave your current job. “Why are you looking for a new job” can be a tough question to answer, especially if the person asking is wary of job-hoppers. Sometimes they may prefer to hear that your reasons for finding a new job are logistics-based. But, if you’re not comfortable letting people know the reason you’re looking, it’s none of their business.


AFAF _ 17.jpg

Yes and no. It’s too early if you’re leaving for something your current employer could offer you, but it’s never too early to make a decision that’s better for your life.

Give your current employer the chance to match the benefits of your new offer. Say something like: “An offer came through from the last time I was applying to jobs. I hadn’t been expecting it or even looking to make a switch, but this offer would be great for my schedule and gives me more of the work experience I’ve been looking for. I know I’ve only been here three months, but would this be something you could match? I don’t want to leave if I could have the same opportunity and schedule here.”

If the answer is no, then they can’t blame you for leaving. If the answer is yes, get more details (and get them in writing) on what exactly your current employer could offer. Sincerely weigh your options, and then make a decision from there. At the end of the day, your current employer may not like having to find someone new so quickly, but the truth is that things happen. As long as you’ve given your current employer the chance to match the offer (if they can), I wouldn’t sacrifice a better schedule or cultural fit just because you feel you owe your current job more time.


I think people get so stuck on the "I have to be at a job for at least a year" thing. We're millennials. We're agile. We pivot. We make ends meet. We try to get ahead. Do what's best for you.


If it works better for you, take it! I think unless you have a long history of job-hopping, the arbitrary “one-year minimum” (or whatever) thing is outdated. If it brings you more happiness in your day-to-day, it’s worth the switch.


AFAF _ 17 (1).jpg

Job hunting is no small feat, and it can be discouraging if you're not getting the results you want. I like to think that if an opportunity doesn't work out, it's because it wasn't meant to be, as cheesy as that sounds. To stay motivated and positive, try shifting gears from traditional job hunting and experiment with alternative routes. Make a list of people you know—and some you don’t know—who are in the position you want (or something similar) and reach out to them for a coffee. Make a list of questions and pick their brains a bit. Having one-on-one conversations about a career path you're excited about could help spark your motivation and give you the extra energy to keep looking for the perfect fit.

Attend networking events, read your industry of choice magazines and research webinars to help you learn more about new trends, company changes, etc., that can help you discover new opportunities.

Lastly, don't be so hard on yourself. If you're feeling burned out, take a step back, a deep breath and unplug for a bit. Take an adventure outdoors with someone you love, catch a sunset or partake in whatever calms your mind. Sometimes, we just need to put away our "work" (whatever that is at the moment) and decompress in order to come back refreshed and ready to tackle the next challenge.


Job hunting can definitely leave you feeling defeated. Take some time to focus on how you can improve your skills before applying for more positions. Figure out what your dream position would be and explore what the qualifications for that position are. Are there any certifications you can complete or skills you can work on to add to your portfolio? Try to understand what will make you stand out from the other candidates and work toward those goals.


After getting rejected 64 (not exaggerating) times, I decided to start accepting the fact that every rejection was a blessing in disguise, because if I wasn’t a good fit for them, they weren’t a good fit for me. This switch in mindset helped me stay positive about the process and make it so that it’s about getting closer to a job that fits my needs.


Until Next Week,



Asking for a Friend is Babes Who Hustle's weekly advice column that asks and answers the work-related questions on all of our minds. Looking for advice and guidance? Hit us with all of your questions below and stay tuned for next Wednesday's edition!

Name *
ex: "xoxo Gossip Girl"
BABE #235: RATHNA NUTI - Primary Care Sports Medicine Physician

BABE #235: RATHNA NUTI - Primary Care Sports Medicine Physician

BABE #234: PAIGE GRIFFITH - Attorney & Photographer

BABE #234: PAIGE GRIFFITH - Attorney & Photographer